God's Creation

2005-05-04T22:00:00.000+08:00

i cant imagine this... my project mate and i rushed to complete our final yr project report (50 pages long), presentation slides and AES in just one wk.. we couldnt even get our AES done properly on our presentation day.. we amended it and submit to our project assessors at the end of the day... our report wasnt even done finished too, the abstract, some unamended errors, content page and page no wasnt done yet.. we told our assessors that we couldnt bind our report as the bookshop queue is very long... that gave us a little bit of extra time to do the final touch-up.. our project supervisor has to come back on sunday to review our report. it's really rushed.. our presentation wasnt well-done too.. i wasnt confident and my voice was soft.. haha.. but thank God i managed to do well in the Q and A sections... and i expect a low B or even a C for my final yr project.. the result was released today... and it turns out that i got a B+ for it!! really thank God for it! coz during the last wk of my project schedule, i need to balance my church activities and project... feeling really stressful! i was still struggling to get my final few samples results in the last wk.. and we did the statistical analysis on within the last 2 days.. but i'm quite happy that we managed to present some real good statistical tables for our results.. i guess we got penalized quite a bit on our presentation. Thank God for this fantastic result..

oh ya but my final grade point average is ard 2.95... ahhh.. another extra 0.05, i'll be in the B range!! hmm.. if i get an A for my project, i would have gotten a B for my final grade point.. hmm.. okie.. but nvm.. =)

2005-04-28T23:32:00.000+08:00

went to sch this afternoon to discuss abt the youth for causes program with cyvia and her friend, wendy..hmm it's a long time since i had a good chat with cyvia... hope everything went well for her... after which met josh and darren (and one of their design friends), they were finding shops to print their name card for the upcoming project showcase.. cool.. haha.. they even designed their own name cards... and they might have an chance to get employed if they works are appreciated by design companies.. after which went to meet eugene (our cL) at tanjong pagar mrt station. we had our dinner at maxwell foodcourt... josh realised he lost his wallet on our way to the mrt... gonna pray for him during QT.. he's really a good shepherd and a brother to me.. next we proceeded to fairfield methodist church for our CG.. the ppl in the unit warmly welcomed us with songs... and we had a fun time praising and worshipping God, learning together and sharing... hmm.. met wan rong there too.. thanx God for her, even though she had lots of work to do but she still flagged a taxi down to attend the CG.. wow... good spirit.. went home after the CG.. had a pretty good time there.. excited for the sunday service... missed NYP alot too... jiayou ppl.. let's serve to our best wherever we are.. NYP unit gonna shine for God!

2005-04-24T21:42:00.000+08:00

yay... accompany one of our new believer, andrew this afternoon.. ken went along too... had lunch at J8 long john silver. andrew asked us for suggestion for a salon haircut that is <$20.. hmm.. haha.. i can only think of $10 express cut.. for me i usually go supercut which cost $23.. coincidentally bumped into darren too.. haha.. wad a small world.. finally get to meet ritchie in the evening... went for dinner.. hmm quite expensive.. initially he wanted to treat me as a farewell dinner for me.. but the food quite ex lar plus service charge and GST.. cant bear to see him pay for the whole dinner.. but thank God for his heart.. he still paid the majority of the bill.. hmm.. if only we can spend more time with one another.. but life has to move on.. i'm moving on to the young adult grp to add strength to them.. i really want to help them pioneering the NS ministry.. i've set my mthly goal liao.. gonna stay faithful to these goals.. but in the mean time, need to train up more before my enlistment.. need to have a healthy impression in order to be salt and light there.. yea..

2005-04-24T11:08:00.000+08:00

not feeling so well today.. not because of the farewell party... but the pain came back again.. sigh.. but strangely i didnt experience that for the last few mths.. i still remember last time i used to have this problem very frequently.. hmm anyway have to bear with the pain and doing my usher duty at the same time.. the farewell party was fun.. not really a surprise.. haha.. thought of spending overnight with ritchie and donnie.. but think will be tiring for them too.. because normally sunday will be a busy day for them...

2005-04-22T23:36:00.000+08:00

Paul wrote:

"For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain." (Philippians 1:21)

2005-04-22T23:04:00.000+08:00

yay my last day of work! hmm sort of relieved and happy.. haha.. but next mon and tue have to go back to train the new batch of NYP students... had more opportunities to chat with the two SP girls today.. all the best to them.. have to endure with the staff there for another 5 weeks.. one of them told me working there is stressful because you wont know when you will get a scolding.. haha.. but the staff had been nice to them so far (maybe because gentler towards girls ba).. they are sort of erm cute (dont mistaken my meaning), whenever the staff raise her voice at us, they will turn their back towards her and flash a scaring expression on their faces.. still remember yesterday my friend got another scolding from the staff because of the SP girls indirectly. the two SP girls did sth not right unknowingly and indirectly cause the stuff to be angry... then they turned back and walked towards me telling me they seemed to have cause my friend to get scolded with that scary expression on their faces... then asked me wad to do next.. hmm.. but it's not entirely their faults.. so yup.. but so far the stuff seems to treat them very nice.. maybe perherps she's more comfortable with girls?

hmm today my last day of work. tml my last day in youth service...
dont feel quite well still (physically)..

2005-04-17T23:55:00.000+08:00

haha went swimming again this morning with joshua, karshun, and andrew at toa payoh... haha. karshun helped me style my hair after the swim.. thanx bro! after that we had lunch at kfc... went to josh's hse.. saw his hamster.. very cute! haha..miss my lost hamster =( .... went for grad's briefing in the afternoon... went to PS with darren and clarence.. saw DI brothers there.. excited to see them there! donnie gave me a bookmark with my name on it and an encouraging verse. caleb=faithfulness! yea... thanx! after that went to dorence hse to follow-up on him.. had an enjoyable time there.. haha can see his tag on my tagboard (i forced him to tag. haha no la.. keke).. meet his family too.. hey bro if ya see this post, remember God's love and faithfulness! and us! haha.. pray that everythings run well for ya orientation program next few days. unleash ya leadership qualities during the orientation period and gorify God with ya leadership qualities. God bless ya! hmm had a late dinner after reaching home.. feeling abit not well.. my throat is dry.. feels like falling sick.. may God strengthen me spiritually and physically! =)

2005-04-16T23:38:00.000+08:00

went swimming in the morning with some of my wushu friends. hmm never thought that i would go swimming again after i quitted since primary six. but somehow its God's calling for me to get out of my comfort zone and try out something new. i used to turn down swimming requests made by my church brothers, one of the reason is because i dont have a swimming trunk but the primary reason is because i strongly dont feel like going (feel that i dont have a great bod to show anyway =p ha!). that's part of my character i need to change (too self conscious). yup strangely on fri night i was inviting one of my wushu friend (leslie always refer this guy as 'the one who doesnt like to step on grass one') to join my sat service, but he turned down my offer and asked me whether i want to join them for a swim in the morning instead! hmm.. at first i type 'no' as my answer. but somehow i felt a sudden compelling of my spirit telling me to join them.. hmm so i agreed althought i didnt have a swimming trunk. can swim in sport short too.. hmm after the swim, i learn one thing, that is try to take up as many interests as possible so that it'll be easier for S.O.Wing purpose next time. hmm.. haha.. somemore after that day, my friends asked me whether we want to meet up regularly for a swim. haha.. mm.. good chance to start building a stronger relationship with them. ohya i finally got my swimming trunk too.. haha

2005-04-12T23:01:00.000+08:00

at last my project is over!! haha.. now preparing to graduate.. haha.. two more wks then i'll be free from attachment! now have more time to focus on God's kingdom.. next wk there will be two SP students coming to work in my lab. excited to meet them!! can s.o.w liao! ha.. and two other girls from NYP will take over our project in may... still have to come back two days to mentor them abt the project.. haha.. last sat went for the grad's briefing. jasmine prompted us about planning our goals in advance. hmm.. actually i sort of figure out wad i want to achieve for Him in the next few yrs.. but not to the extent of adulthood or even after that.. haha.. too far for me.. but after hearing wad jasmine said... i decided to do that too.. hmm... right now its a secret.. keke.. will post them some other day..

2005-03-26T22:17:00.000+08:00

an exciting day! mover for 1st 2 services and mover + usher for 3rd service.. haha.. tiring but all is worth it!! doing them for God! saw lots of ppl crossing the line to know God.. wow.. wad a wonderful sight! God blessed NYP2 with 2 new brothers too! praise God!!

2005-03-25T22:07:00.000+08:00

wow.. went for the easter service rehearsal! wow. the drama is damn cool! really excited for tml service! i'm supposed to be the mover for the first two services with alvin and cedric. have to carry the 'victim' down the stage with stretcher of crse.. haha.. yup the drama is a suspense thriller.. yea. the song + rap presentation is cool too. thanx God for eilton, jo-n and jeremy.. after the rehearsal, help darren and liyan with the easter decoration.. hee.. managed to hang the disco ball on top of the ceiling with fishing strings.. too bad it cant rotate coz the rotator is too heavy to be hung on top.. after that had dinner, shop ard PS looking for vcds and my usher red polo tee..

2005-03-21T22:30:00.000+08:00

The Shadow of the Cross

While taking a class in photography at the University of Cincinnati, a Christian became acquainted with a young man named Charles Murray who also was a student at the school and training for the summer Olympics as a high diver.

Charles was very patient, listening to him for hours about how Jesus had saved him. Charles was not raised in a home that attended any kind of church, so all that was told to him was a fascination. He even began to ask questions about forgiveness of sin.

Finally, the day came that the question was put to him, Have you realized your need of a Redeemer, and are you ready to trust Christ as your Savior?' His countenance fell and the guilt was in his face. But his reply was a strong "No."

In the days that followed, he was quiet and often avoided the believer until one day Charles decided to call him. He wanted to know where to look in the New Testament for some verses about salvation. He declined to meet but thanked the Christian for the Scripture references. He was greatly troubled but was not ready to receive help.

Because he was training for the Olympic games, Charles had special privileges at the university pool facilities. Some time between 10:30 and 11:00 that evening, he decided to go swim and practice a few dives. It was a clear night in October, and the moon was big and bright. The University pool was housed under a ceiling of glass panes, so the moon shone bright across the top of the wall in the pool area.

Charles climbed to the highest platform to take his first dive. At that moment the Spirit of God began to convict him of his sins. All the scripture he had read, all the occasions of witnessing to him about Christ flooded his mind.

He stood on the platform backwards to make his dive, spread his arms to gather his balance looked up to the all, and saw his own shadow caused by the light of the moon. It was in the shape of a cross. He could hear the burden of his sin no longer. His heart broke, and he sat down on the platform and asked God to forgive him and save him. He trusted Jesus Christ twenty-some feet in the air.

Suddenly, the light in the pool area came on. The attendant had come in to check the pool. As Charles looked down from his platform he saw an empty pool, which had been drained for repairs. He had almost plummeted to his death, but the cross had stopped him from disaster.

For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.
I Corinthians 1:18

2005-03-20T01:41:00.000+08:00

"I Turn To You"

When I'm lost in the rain,
In your eyes I know I'll find the light
To light my way.
And when I'm scared,
And losing ground,
When my world is going crazy,
You can turn it all around.
And when I'm down you're there
- pushing me to the top.
You're always there,
giving me all you've got.

For a shield from the storm,
For a friend, for a love
to keep me safe and warm
I turn to you.
For the strength to be strong,
For the will to carry on
For everything you do,
for everything that's true
I turn to you.

When I lose the will to win,
I just reach for you and
I can reach the sky again.
I can do anything
'Cause your love is so amazing,
'Cause your love inspires me.
And when I need a friend,
You're always on my side
Giving me faith
taking me through the night

For the arms to be my shelter
through all the rain,
For truth that will never change,
For someone to lean on,
For a heart I can rely on through anything,
For that one who I can run to...

For a shield from the storm,
For a friend, for a love
to keep me safe and warm
I turn to you
For the strength to be strong,
For the will to carry on
For everything you do,
for everything that's true
I turn to you.
For a shield from the storm,
For a friend, for a love
to keep me safe and warm
I turn to you.
For the strength to be strong,
For the will to carry on
For everything you do,
for everything that's true
I turn to you.
I turn to you...

not exactly a biblical song sang by a ermm *cough* biblical person. ha.. but it best relates my cry to Him (God).. the lyrics are beautiful...

2005-03-19T23:49:00.000+08:00

service as usual.. pastor shared a powerful and inspiring story... it really stirred my heart and strenghten my faith in Him...after service i was lost in the S11 foodcourt.. i'm like a lost sheep wondering around... i called leslie, he didnt answer my call.. i called joshua, didnt answer my call too.. sigh.. in the end i went out with darren and zhiwei... msg donovan just now.. sorry brother, couldnt celebrate ya bday.. my affirmation to ya is in the card. ya have been a wonderful brother to me.. always add laughter to the caregroup... thank God for ya... oh ya.. when i reached amk, i realised i havent collect the camp registration forms.. ah.. haiz... wad's happening to me.. i couldnt even do such a simple task God has given me.. sigh.. nobody picked my call again... planned to watch a movie but too late.. went home after that.. thank God for big jon and donnie.. thanks for asking me to join ya guys.. mayb next time when ya guys have other actitivies ba.. really appreciate alot.. btw my language of love is spending quality time if ya guys dont know.. nvm it doesnt matter anyway..

2005-03-18T23:32:00.000+08:00

a busy week... rushing project throughout the week.. completed the slides on thursday afternoon.. presented on fri morning.. didnt sleep well.. next few weeks i'll be rushing for final presentation, AES and written reports... die.. the presentation didnt went well.. the assessers said we focued too much on the wrong stuffs.. ended up, they asked only 2 questions.. which is quite little.. not because our slides are perfect but because they dont know wad to ask based on our slides... gonna do well for the final one.. didnt know that the guys having PM on fri afternoon.. donovan told me on thursday night actually... i didnt receive any emails from leslie regarding the PM.. couldnt accompany donovan to buy his guitar stuffs because got caught up with something last min.. couldnt attend the PM too.. enjoyed myself on tuesday evening.. bring back old memories..

2005-03-14T23:58:00.000+08:00

yay! i finally got my intron 4 results after repeated failures last wk! wow.. haha.. i couldnt really express my feelings in words how God has brought me through during this tough period... He (God) has blessed me many times during my attachment and project.. everytime i faced some technical problems during experiment, He will somehow turn failures into successful testimonies.. somehow i just managed to solve those problems.. of course not by my own wisdom, but by His wisdom and ways.. hmm i think i could finish all the normaltensive patients' samples within 2 weeks! initially i thought of giving up.. now the problem is solved! instead now i'm struggling with my presentation and reports! first presentation this fri! hmm the slides more or less are done but i feel that the animations are not there.. hmm still need to make some amendments.. but time is running up.. still havent rehearse yet.. going to do give my presentation slides a final touch later! haha.. i have so much energy right now! after the PM at rix's hse.. went for diner at KFC.. then took the same bus home together with giselle and xing xing. thank God for giselle.. she really lighten up my whole day with her 'Hi!' greeting everytime.. haha.. jiayou, mature to the next level of faith!

sigh.. now my mom is lecturing me on her own theory of 'tithing' again! haha.. althought i had tried to save during sat by skiping lunch and tithe.. i even calculated properly.. for e.g now i have 30 bucks in my wallet. i'll just skip my lunch and at the end of the day make sure my wallet left 20 bucks.. haha.. spent 10 bucks on 2 meals sounds reasonable rite.. sigh i did this every wk.. make sure she dont get too affected by how much i spent.. but now she still says i spent all my money to tithe and donation.. she said every fri night my wallet at least have 30 bucks but after sat nite, my wallet will left ard 5 bucks.... diaoz.. i didnt fail my O level maths lor.. haha.. i always calculate beforehand one.. haha... i didnt really spend much... 10 bucks for 2 meals reasonable.. but nvm.. let her misunderstand me ba.. but something she said sounds true... she worked till her leg skin peeled off..coz need to run here and there mah.. quite painful.. but she still worried that i have no money to eat.. sometimes i really feel her burden and tireness.. but she dont see the big picture here.. why cant she just ignore how i'm going to spend my allowance.. even though i do skip meals but i dont feel hungry lor.. i wont torture myself one.. haha.. i really want to study hard now, work hard next time and give her my best care and support after i get a job... going to receive my attachment allowance soon.. haha.. looking forward to it! keke..

2005-03-13T23:59:00.000+08:00

feeling so ermm sticky all over my body.. had a shower immediately after reaching home.. slept the whole morning and afternoon.. haha.. hmm.. replying lots of messages and answering calls in a half-awake mode.. haha. wondering did i send any wrong messages or say any dream words =b.. but really felt exhausted after sat's ministry duty and the collection of camp registration fee.. haiz.. it's very chaotic.. didnt really obey zhenyan's advice (collect the money during weekdays).. i made her job difficult in the end.. next time i should take a more initiative role by approaching the ppl instead of them finding me..

a special day to me.. =) thanx leslie for ya tagboard msg!

2005-03-12T23:59:00.000+08:00

reached nexus in the morning to take care of the Hope store.. now Hope store starts operation from 11am till 8pm! haha this means that there's a time extension in my duty hrs too.. haha.. but it's sokie with me.. i really want to serve this ministry to the best that i can while i'm still in student service.. bcoz of the shortage in manpower, i had to skip the sowing class and meeting in the afternoon.. most of the time i'll be alone in the store.. tried out the new dvd player there.. quite cool.. watched the hillsong united and planet shakers' dvd.. their praise atmosphere is so high... read some books.. planning to buy the 'becoming a man of God' (forget the exact title but something like this..) book after service.. but haha somebody bought it before me.. and that's the last book left on the shelve!! sigh.. tiring day.. met a few tacky situations, receipt paper run out, cash register cannot open.. and the total cash amt doesnt tally with the system's amount.. after the service went to darren's hse.. stayed overnight watching vcd and chatting.. haha i slept halfway through the conversation! oh ya.. i finally got my Hope membership card!!! nice.. haha.. hmm encouraged by yiquan, leslie and giselle's cards.. =) cheerios!

2005-03-09T23:34:00.000+08:00

yea today is a combined CG between NYP2 and NYP3! its really fun as most of the nyp bros are gathered together in a small settings. really feel the warmth of this family. althought i'm quite confused with the CG roles.. but overall the CG was fun and encouraging. learn alot from leslie, eilton and donovan today. thanx for praying for me before the CG start too. ya guys added strength to me.. thanx for the encoragements.. and patience with me.. haha.. coz i was abit tensed and i kept on singing too fast while practicing, didnt coordinate well with the guitarist. and my voice is drowned by the guitar.. afew times i was laughing after i start singing the first line.. suddenly i felt like i'm tone-deaf.. haha.. but thank God for the encouraging brothers! and surprisingly i can carry the tune quite okie during the worship.. must really thank God for His Spirit and anointing... except that i forget one line of the lyrics.. hmm.. really need to discipline myself well and prepare really well before the CG. i've decided to buy a guitar after i get my pay.. and learn guitar from jon-n! i really want to worship Him even when i'm at home playing the guitar.. i think it will help in my spiritual growth too.. somemore next time i can teach my sheeps too.. haha

after CG went home with yiquan... we shared some of our life and i asked for his feedback.. haha.. hmm.. really thank God for this brother too.. yea.. we are spiritual buddies le.. althought i only have a few weeks before i transfer but we didnt miss this chance to be covenanted as each other spiritual buddy.. must teach me guitar too k.. haha..

ya.. plus want to thank God for liyan, joshua and giselle! have a great time at settlers' cafe last sun. althought i might not express them in my words and/or we seldom talk but i really feel touched by you guys whenever i see ya guys... thanks for being my shepherd josh.. althought we dont share a common interest but we share a common vision and faith in our heart (that is to serve Him together!).

2005-03-07T22:33:00.000+08:00

stressful period? couldnt get results for the final yr project? sometimes we do meet failures, setbacks and stress.. i think we should focus less on our failures, stress etc... BUT focus all our attention on Him, believe in Him that He will turn every situations fine. i believe that kind of extraordinary faith will motivate ya to do even better. ya will have a clearer mind and a correct heart attitude to continue on with ya experiments.. those who ask will receive, those who seek Him will find and those who knocks, the door will be opened! dont worry too much k! focus on His ability to help ya (and not the problems)! i've been through that tough period whereby i couldnt get any pcr products for my project.. true, at first its demoralizing and frustrating but i put aside all these negative thoughts. and in the end i have a clearer mind to think, clearer mind to evaluate where my problems lies and clearer mind to set my goals.. i become more peaceful and still and God really helps me during that period.. my techniques improve... walk in accordance with the Spirit... God cant clear ya path till you are still.. ya can do it! =) start each day with anticipation that God will protect ya with His grace and mercy.

2005-03-06T13:58:00.000+08:00

the day is coming soon.. suddenly have a feeling wanting to spend more time with my nyp bros... these are the ppl that God has placed in my life who walk closely with me.. we encourages each others.. fellowship with each others.. learning together.. growing in maturity together and serving Him together with a common heart and purpose... yesterday service was great... the atmosphere is so happening... another few more weeks for me to enjoy the sat service. haha.. had a enjoyable long chat with ken during dinner...yea.. his enthusiastic heartbeat for God and his desire to outreach to people encourages me alot.. he shared with me some of his views and asked me lots of questions.. haha.. yea con't to grow in maturity brother! this week has been quite a fruitful week for me.. the relationship between God and me grew so much more intimate.. i can sense His calling for me.. i can sense His Holy Spirit comforting me and correcting my wrongs.. its just so miraculous... enjoy His presence alot... haha.. thank God i'm in Your family.. today supposed to learn abt the purpose driven life sermon at cyvia's church but woke up late.. actually i planned not to slp last nite.. i wanted to read and spend more time with Him.. listening to worship songs... i just dont feel like slping last nite.. haha that's the reason why i cant wake up early this morning.. paiseh cyvia =b.... hmm.. apart from nyp bros.. i want to spend more time with my spiritual buddies.. but there's just no time... hmm.. nvm... yay.. ya know.. althought i cant bear to leave Poly/DI but i know God has a greater plan for me when i transfer to young adults group.. i know His plan for me never fail and harm me.. but prosper me... i can sense that.. i'm so excited for the new change.. the feeling is just so great.. i'm anticipating it.. i'm gonna outreach to the NS guys soon.. haha and i've already plan what i'm going to do after my NS.. i believe that's what God wants me to do.. hee.. the next few yrs in young adults group will be a great new learning experience for me as well as a preparation for what i'm planning to do after NS... i want to move on to the next maturity stage... yea... i'm gonna live life to the fullest with no regrets at all!

btw next sunday is a very very special day to me.. haha.. ya guys can guess what is it? haha no prize for correct guessing =b

2005-03-03T22:30:00.000+08:00

Open Up The Gates

by Planet Shakers

We come into this Holy place

To bring a sacrifice of praise

Bow down before you and seek your face

We sing of the mighty things you've done

Cry out to you

"let your will be done"

Tell all the World you're the Holy One

Hear the shouts of praise

As they're rising up to you

Come and fill this place

As we bring glory to your name

Open up the gates and let the

King of glory in

Fill this house with praises as we

Lift our hands and worship you

Open up the doors and let your

Glory fill the earth

King of heaven we dance before your throne

King of heaven come and

Take your place

Dwell among us as we

Seek your face

2005-03-03T01:38:00.000+08:00

the doctors here are so nice.. they are approachable and down-to-earth.. everytime i see them they will smile back at me.. because of my attchment i have to interact with doctors almost everyday to get patient's blood sample.. they are really friendly.. maybe it's because of their professions.. they have to interact with their patients and stuff like that.. but i really want to learn from their positive attitude.. i still remember dr lim gave us boxes of CNY cookies a few wks back.. haha.. and he kept on calling me friend in the beginnings coz he doesnt know my name.. haha.. funny.. then today dr wong gave me a packet of apple juice and choc bar. hmm.. haha.. sometimes i have fear talking to them.. haha... i mean they are professionals.. and i'm just a attachment student.. btw dr lim is more than 1.8m.. real tall.. haha.. okie.. mm.. alot of stuffs happen today.. had a not-so-friendly conversation with my friend today.. after all he doesnt really understand my problems and burdens.. i find that ppl are normally selfish.. and sometimes life is like that.. take for example when i made a mistake, my friend would quickly made this sentence "i'm not going to be responsible for that. it's your business".. i mean i dont want you to be responsible of course!.. it's my mistake i would admit it myself.. but at least can give me some encouraging words mah.. it's like after hearing that you more or less have a feeling that when u have troubles, you wont trust that this friend will lend a listening ears, be there for you comfort you blah blah.. but i guess he wasnt intentional.. he apologised after that... in the past when i was still a young christian, my friends made comments on christianity.. its quite a sensitive topic.. i mean they dont really understand and make assumptions in their comments.. i was abit shaken of course.. that's why now i'm quite reserved when talking to them.. i cant share my problems with them.. our faith are different.. well.. but we still hang out occasionally.. talk abt our sch work projects..they are nice friends... but when it comes to personal struggles i feel that i have feel ppl to turn to except God and a few church buddies.. i think i've lost the feeling of true friendship..i dont know

2005-02-24T23:08:00.000+08:00

got a testimony to share.. two days ago i got this blood sample from the clinic.. need to extract the dna from the blood... the extraction takes 2 days... first day was fine i did all the steps.. then i continued the extraction the 2nd day (which is yesterday).. i was real absent-minded that day.. i centrifuge the tube after adding nacl.. it took 30mins to centrifuge btw.. after 30 mins went back and took the tube (without realising that i took the wrong tube). i thought there was sth wrong because the solution was very clear and there was no dna pellet.. i became panic of course.. i thought i spoilt the blood sample.. its kind of serious because the patient can actually sue us and i didnt know how to tell my supervisor.. i just went home that day with really bad mood and spirit. one of my church bro asked me out for movie that day but didnt go coz of that incident.. so yesterday nite i just prayed to God asking Him for courage so that i can admit my mistakes to my supervisor today... then this morning when i was bathing preparing to work.. suddenly i realised that i could have taken the wrong tube that day so i couldnt extract any dna... this came across my mind and caught my attention.. i think God really answer my prayer when i'm least expected and unprepared... haha.. so i hanged on to this only hope and rushed out of my house.. throughout the journey to the lab i prayed to God again in my heart that i could find the lost tube and that the dna wont be spoilt overnight... and yay i found the tube.. haha.. so i cont with the steps and got a very thin thread of dna.. thank God man.. now i'm safe..haha.. i didnt know i was so careless.. never thought this would happen to me.. sigh... must change to be more alert next time.. haha.. thank God once again for answering my prayer!!

2005-02-21T01:42:00.000+08:00

thanx cyvia and jon for treating me the dinner just now at kfc.. =)

have a great time at donnie's hse just now.. feel so refreshed after the fellowship.. he's really a great man of God.. blessed by his cooking too... haha.. cont to impact and protect your sheeps! take care of ya health too! ya can do it!

2005-02-21T01:28:00.000+08:00

yea managed to sneak in the saturday service during worship. a new refreshed feeling during the worship. i can relate to God's love intimately as i sang the song.. and i feel so loved by Him that i wanted to give Him my most worthy and high praises and worship. i find this sentence so real 'a backslider is one who loves God less today than yesterday'.. i came upon this sentence once again today in a book i glimpse through at donnie's hse... it seems like God is prompting me a message in this statement. yes the truth abt me is that all along i have be wondering around like a lost soul.. a lukewarm christian who is neither hot nor cold. but right now i have decided to walk along God's plan, His purpose for me long before i came into this world.. nothing beats this Truth.. God is our Creator.. our body can be an excellent evidence for this case of a Creator.. do u think we could evolve from an ape to a complex human body with thinking and conscience? art of seeing... even Charles Darwin once stated that the thought of the eye, and how it could possibly be produced by natural selection, made him ill. thus there is no other option. God is indeed our Creator. He created us because He first loves us. and in order to know our purpose here in this earth we need to seek and ask our Creator. if we dont believe and acknowledge this Creator (God), life would make no sense. just like the purpose of an invention is determined by its inventor..

only two things that will last for eternity. one is God's Words and the other is souls.. yes... souls of the people ard us.. its time to realise that what we are doing now is just a preparation for our eternity... why are we spreading the gospel? because we love the ppl ard us; our family, our friends, our neighbours... we yearn to see their souls being saved just like ourselves.... its all because of this simple gesture of love. nothing complicated here... just spreading God's love.... so that ppl who believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. evangelism is just one of the five purposes He has for us in this temporary life... the other four purposes we need to accomplish are to worship Him, fellowshipping with God's family, discipleship (becoming more Christ-like) and ministry (shaped for serving God). a potion of the text here is inspired by the purpose-driven life book coz i just started reading this book not long ago.. =b yessh God i really want to fulfil all these purposes You have for me in my christian walk with Ya!

2005-02-19T01:00:00.000+08:00

celebrated chee how's bday today.. haha althought abit late but its really a rare oppunities to gather... had dinner at pastamania then watched a movie titled a moment to remember.. quite a touching movie... hmm now is stressful period. my first presentation will be around 18 march exactly one month from now! plan in my mind alreadly... next wk gather all the resources, then wk 2 and 3 prepare slide and sort out the preliminary results to put in the slide, last wk rehearse! 2nd final presentation will be in middle april.. sigh... alot of paper work to do.. havent read finish all the literature articles... but today we confronted Dr Moe abt the personal issues we have in the lab with one of our ermmm colleague (who always scolded us for nthing or minor stuff)? finally we are over man.. not going to be under her supervision from next wk onwards.. yay... all thanx to her man, if she didnt complain to Dr Moe first we wont have this chance to bring out the matter to him... jackie had alreadly apologised to her yet she still scolded him and even say something nasty... plus throwing the centrifuge tubes (with our precious patients' DNA) on us.. Dr Moe agreed that the stuff she did on us is too overboard.. haiz... there's lots of ridiculous stuff she did but haha not nice to write here... okie need to search some stuffs for our project.. thanx God that He gives me the wisdom for my project.. my project is progessing slowly but steadily... i believe more is still to come.. coz He will bless those who seek Him ernestly in humility... His blessings are like overflowing water from a small tiny bottle.. it never end... Thank God.. next wk gonna start my intron 4 analysis.. pray that everything runs smoothly...

2005-02-16T00:31:00.000+08:00

miss your smile.. take care.. God loves ya

2005-02-13T00:40:00.000+08:00

tired now but totally refreshed by Him from the inside... wow today service as usual exciting and inspiring.... couldnt catch my breath coz today need to do alot of stuffs... making my headaches worse... sigh... and one funny thing.. halfway thru the usher duties my jean button ermm came loss.. than God the other one is still tight.. but i still have to be careful coz i'm skinny in the first place..haha so i put one of hand in my pocket to try to ermm support it.. haha.. so embarrassing... urgh.. throughout the service i'm considering abt the church camp.. coz i still not sure of my enlistment date so i dont know whether i should register.. somemore its a hugh amt ya see.. but i decided to put all my faith in Him and trust that He will make my path straight.. yea i decide to reg first.. need to pray real desperate for this.. haha coz i dont want to miss this camp! it's going to be fun fellowshipping and learning His words together as a big family!! yay.. haha couldnt contain my excitement now.. yup.. paiseh again to donnie.. just now i was thinking abt some stuff and ya came and greet me.. wasnt quite friendly to ya coz i'm still in a daze... paiseh again... watched free movie after service... haha the perfect 10 valentime day promotion.. a funny show.. haha..cya guys!!!!!

2005-02-08T01:18:00.000+08:00

read through the resource operating manual once more... last sat forgotten the shortcut keys during duty... missed the celebration last evening at coilin's hse.... got a runny nose... today abit better.. sigh.. tml they're watching midnight show constantine... but i guess i stay home and accompany my family.. it's a rare chance to spend time with my mom.. all my relatives in malaysia.. another boring CNY for me.. haha...

haha i have holiday till next mon! take leave on fri.. =b... at last can take a break from that 'horror' place.. keke.. not that exaggerating but that place really gives me lots of negative feelings.. every morning i have to drag myself to work.. i can foretell tml morning gonna hear another scolding again.. be it jackie or me.. it's the same.. can you imagine that kind of working environment.. even if you are angry for wadever reason, you cant anyhow throw things at ppl... it so ridiculous but she did it (when our supervisor is not around of course)... then today jackie got a scolding.. she just kicked the chair deliberately towards him.. and use her leg to kick open the cabinet...our supervisor just ignore those commotion and let her vent her anger on jackie.. i mean come on.. from the start you alr give us bad morale to work.. ya expect wad from us? blame us for our bad working attitude? why not reflect on yourself..

yea.. after tml morning.. break all the way till monday! then tahan for another 11 wks. .then byeeeeee to that place forever..

2005-02-06T17:48:00.000+08:00

watch fighter in the wind last night.. average show... at last i could relax and catch my breath while walking home yesterday night... the chilling wind... the lonely street with nobody.. reached home took a bath.. read through Hope seminary booklet... chatted with a friend in msn whom i havent seen for mths... through the conversation, i got my heart refocused. hmmm which word can describe my feeling now?? numbed? is my heart getting more and more hardened???????? as i'm writing these my heart is in a state of confusiuon.... God.... help me... i want to communicate with You like i never did before...

did my QT ard 2am... but my vision became blurrer and blurrer as i read the verses.... i couldnt see the words..... how come???????? satan is indeed working 24hrs a day.... thank God my Holy Spirit alerted me and revives me from my tireness

cant wait for 18 Feb....

my friends if ya reading this.. i really dont know wad happen... and mayb ya have ya reasons for not telling me.. but dont worry. everything will turns out right and ok... i'll keep ya in prayer... even though we seldom meet or talk but i really love ya guys alot... wadever problems you guys might facing now will soon be over.... :)

and to my wushu frens... ya guys training for inter-sch competition now... i really want to join.. to be frank i really miss wushu. .althought my lips had been complaining abt the exhausting training and fears etc... but i know ya guys can make it through! do proud for nyp!!

heyo donnie.. didnt expect ya to talk to me yesterday...i could see ya smiling now... con't to stay vibrant for God! =)

2 Tim 3:16-17
All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.

2005-01-30T21:15:00.000+08:00

Where can I go from Your Spirit?

Where can I flee from Your presence?

If I go up to the heavens, You are there;

if I make my bed in the depths, You are there.

If i rise on the wings of the dawn,

if i settle on the far side of the sea,

even there Your hand will guide me,

and Your right hand shall hold me fast.

(Ps. 139:7-10 NIV)

God i could never outrun Your Love. even if i were to escape to the far ends of the earth. i will find You there waiting for me. because You have always been running side by side with me. only You can touch my heart like no one else. Your love and power of Your word extends to my darkest secrets and deepest needs. and so here i am Lord, willinginly giving to You my praise and honor.

2005-01-30T01:30:00.000+08:00

yea it's sat again.. today is ESS.. alot of visitors came.. i was doing my usher duties as usual.. stood outside the lift all alone and welcoming the visitors.. then got one very funny and weird incident.. shall not elaborate here.. opening of the service was very loud.. esp the drums and percussion performance... this wk service unlike last wk emphasize much on playing instruments... cedric shared his testimony on stage.. jiayou bro! ya did a great job! after service had dinner with the bros.. i was sitting with ken, kar shun and leslie.. haha.. they are all jay fanatics... throughout the dinner they were singing jay's songs and rapping non-stop.. recording their singing down.. even the grace became a rap in the end.. funny sia.. really enjoyed the dinner with them! after that went to PS with some DI bros.. then we also met alot of other hope units ppl here too... haha.. slacked there till 10pm.. then went back to the meridian hotel bus stop to meet the tp bros, ritchie, cecil, zheng min and abel.. went home together.. surprised to see joe (the ushering head) at the tampines interchange.. somemore we took the same bus home.. haha.. didnt know that he stay near my house until today.... chatted with him during the bus journey.. haha.. i always thought he's a quiet guy like me.. oh yup.. weibin's birthday today!! just sent him a msg.. bro just to let ya knoe i'll always be there supporting ya... sometimes i dont really knoe how to relate to ya.. in the past i always kept quiet and stuff like that.. that's because i wasnt confident of myself.. but anyway really pray hard that you'll do well in your O's.. and set a goal for yaself.. dont be aimless like a difting boat in the sea.. jiayou!

2005-01-27T01:27:00.000+08:00

Only God can move mountains, but faith and prayer move God. - E. M. Bounds

updates... yea... feel so refresh now.. just read one chapter of a book I bought this afternoon.. hee.. its like an intercessory prayer handbook. and a new layout.. haha.. hope ya guys enjoy it.. yea..

2005-01-16T02:08:00.000+08:00

wow.. so tired man... yesterday (fri) went to celebrate edmund's bday at PS cafe cartel.. ate till so full... grilled chicken, bday cakes, ice creams and lots of sweets. haha.. then we decide to bowl at cineleisure but was too late.. the bowling center closed.. so we went to east coast park there to play... then we chatted at macafe and stayed overnite there..we chatted abt everything under the sun.. from christianity to christina's dog.. haha.. i was too tired and dozed off for a few mins several times..yesterday conversation triggered me to think lots of stuff.. like chinese medium and demon-prossessed..how Bible really comes about.. credibility of the Bible.. and evolution vs genesis etc etc etc... they really poured out their doubts and thoughts.. i realised i need to read more abts these stuffs too.. coz i wasnt too ready to answer them.. haha.. we ate the mac breakfast.. the breakfast there comes out as early as 545am.. planned to catch sunrise but didnt manage to see it.. took a cab home and slp =p.. really broke now.. haha.. after all those spending.. today (sat) didnt manage to wake up before 2pm.. absent for usher briefing.. sorry.. but lucky manage to reach nexus at 430pm and do my ushering... after service took bus 65 with jeremy and weijie... and weijie and me decided to walk to my house (he went to meet his friend) from tamp interchange. haha.. we shared many things during the long journey..the most amazing thing is that we chatted till 1230am at my blk corridor till his friend come.. haha.. it's been two mths since we really sit down and shared our life exp.. throughout the conversation with him, i got refreshed myself.. thanx for ya accompany btw bro.. i'm not so stressed rite now.. haha.. i recalled back my life in the past.. before and after i know Christ... went through lots of trials... but i'm still standing firm.

2005-01-09T20:28:00.000+08:00

yoz.. updates for this wk.. yay... i cut my hair again.. haha.. ya.. now even shorter.. haha.. yup and xing xing came for our cg last wk... had fun fellowshipping with the brothers and learning together.. happy for xing xing man.. he had been asking me whether there's any activities on thu, fri or sat.. haha he even asked whether there will be cg again next wed.. wow.. he's looking forward to our cg! after cg, i saw zhiwei! haha... he just finished his wushu training.. he's still as humorous as usual... he said cant recognize me coz of my new hairstyle.. haha.. we chatted abit abt wushu and some personal stuff.. haha.. too bad my bus came shortly after that.. at that time i didnt really feel like boarding the bus lor... coz i had so much to tell him... sigh.. i wonder we'll be able to see each other soon.. and all my wushu frens.. i miss school.. i got my final NS checkup on wed too.. i got a Pes B...
sat was fun... resource gathering in the morning.. had lunch with some resource bros and sis... hanging ard PS in the afternoon with karshun and eilton... and finally.. there's a solution for my two ministries clashing schedule! feel so relieved after hearing that man! now i can concentrate on each ministry and do my best... after service, had dinner at S11.. then stayed there till 10pm acc yiquan, ken and eilton... yiquan was studying for his test on mon.. all for the best to him.. will pray for him too... and ken was reading his bible.. yea... jiayou bro (ken), hope ya relationship with God grows more and more each day! yup and karshun.. if ya reading this.. take care for ya health man.. rest more and drink more water.. ya looked so tired yesterday... there's a birthday celebration for one of my pri sch fren next fri.. hmm..yea more chances for me to sow on them... i need new contact pool.. Lord..

2005-01-02T16:51:00.000+08:00

In order to arrive at what you are not

You must go through the way in which you are not.

T.S. Eliot

2005-01-02T14:47:00.000+08:00

new yr celebration for Poly/DI happened yesterday @ downtown east... through the event, the brotherhood between xing xing, ken, kiat boon and me become closer.. really excited for them.. hee.. oops forget to give kiat boon the encouragement card again.. but i can see they enjoyed the water bomb game.. haha.. i didnt join coz i dont want to get wet.. haha.. yup... yesterday was a busy day for me.. sigh.. ministry duties clashed again.. sigh.. the collection of celebration money was quite last minute also.. haiz.. run here run there.. tired me out..

anyway now i'm supposed to be at PS watching Kung Fu Hustle with my friends.. but i cant coz i have to stay at home to wait for the leaders to send me the latest cg database... havent been hanging out with them ever since our attachment started.. i feel that the distance between the four of us becomes further and further from the time i came to know God.. wad really happened? i dont know.. my wushu frens too.. i quitted a mth ago.. the time we spent together now is like 0..

2005-01-01T01:17:00.000+08:00

i have blessings to share today!! hee.. yup abt my attachment again.. finally after trying out the new dna extraction protocol for a few times, we got a clean dna sample (after some optimization of the steps) today.. haha.. praise God... after much failures and changes in the past, i finally feels that i can do ALL things thru Him now... yup.. alot of things happened today. went to work in the morning and then rush hme to have lunch. after lunch, i was heading towards orchard to meet the nyp bros for a kbox session.. but eilton called and said it was cancelled.. then i thought since weibin was also meeting his friends in orchard ard the same time, i decided to look for him.. but then shortly after eilton's call, weibin msged me that his not meeting his friends.. sigh.. so i alighted the train and took a bus home.. during the bus journey, i was thinking how God has blessed me ever since i know Him.. and suddenly the old grandma that donnie wrote in his blog flashes thru my mind.. i felt really terrible after reading the incident.. i also dont know why i just msged donnie how's the grandma doing.. he replied me and asked me whether i want to visit her today.. so i thought since i got nthing to do, why not..? i realli want to share this bro's burden and also help the grandma.. so i u-turned back again to tampines interchange and took a bus to amk.. haha.. i was like travelling ard s'pore the whole day... i decided to ask weibin along since he lives at amk.. yup... i havent seen him for more than a wk le.. realli want to follow-up on him... yup i guess i was too tired, i slept on the bus.. when i woke up i was quite drowsy and blur.. yup donnie made some bread for her while weibin and i bought some milo for the old lady.. we went to her hse and waited for some time but nobody answered.. so we left our stuff outside her door and leave.. donnie had to rush for a soccer game with his frens while weibin and i decided to play pool at central.. haha.. it has been some times since we went out and play together le.. okie... that's all for today.. i thought for some time alr, i decide to take the old lady's add from donnie tml.. i've decided to deliver some daily necessities for her every wk.. i want to give sacrificially.. althought i might not have much to give but i will try my best to set aside some savings to bless the ppl in need..

2004-12-31T01:39:00.000+08:00

wow.. God is faithful! He answered my prayer! oh yup.. yea.. i was praying that i can improve my PCR these few days.. and joshua prayed for me yesterday too! finally after some optimization and being more focused during pipetting of the reagents, i finally got a band today!! althought it's not really clean.. coz there's some smear but it's an improvement too!! God really help me find back my confidence once again.. hee.. yay.. tml half-day.. i think i just go there complete my dna extraction and go home.. haha.. but i need to speed up my pace now.. coz i'll be receiving my project in a few wks time.. so now is like training my hand to be more skillful.. now only at the PCR stage.. still have a few more things to learn... =)

yup have a gd chat with liyan today.. and the NB's celebration party.. gosh.. i cant act realli.. hai.. still want me to act jay chou. haha.. feel so paiseh.. hee... anyway.. liyan reminded me abt being careful with the words that we often used.. coz she realised i always use the word stress.. so sub-consciously i might get stress easily coz it's in my mind alr.. yup same as negative comments.. if ya hear too much negative comments all the time, ya will get discouraged one day.. so i really urge every one of us to encourage one another everyday.. coz a man who refreshes others will him himself be refreshed!!

here's some verse for ya!!
Proverbs 21:23 He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity.
Hebrews 3:13 But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin's deceitfulness.

2004-12-30T01:35:00.000+08:00

feeling not gd.. weak.. vommiting.. headaches.. hamster escaped.. =(

2004-12-28T22:25:00.000+08:00

had been suffering from slight depression yesterday.. haha.. not to worry.. just a minor one.. I'm amazed how God put me back to the right path so quickly yesterday.. ya knoe.. i cried abit yesterday... but stopped shortly after i heard His voice.. it's so miraculous... i just couldnt help crying yesterday... oh well.... everythin seems to go wrong man.. i couldnt get results... not productive enough... and my fren just ignored me totally when i'm down.. sigh... he didnt even say a word.. ya he didnt discourage me but neither did he encourage me.. sigh...i guess that's just his personalities ba.. but i hate that expression on his face man... i felt so stress when supervisor asked us abt our results.. sigh. everytime he will say that i couldnt get any result with a real weird expression looking at me... wad's the prob man..? i couldnt shallow my pride to try to communicate with him.. instead i kept quiet and showed him my attitude... sigh.. i really need to change.. thanx God today i manage to put on a friendly smile.. and we r quite okie now lar... i realise i need to be more humble... God stilled my heart during my QT.. i'm able to think more clearly and adjust my heart... yea... thanx gis.. i'm okie.. i guess i have to keep on ignoring those msgs ba... haiz.. i wont be affected (it's another guy btw if ya knoe wad i'm writing).. i'm not turning back... =)

oh yah.. my mom complaining now again.. haiz.. just because i'm not coming home for dinner tml and thu... i feel like i'm living in a cage man... but she's stressed abt my finanical thing lar.. sigh.. i understand... i alr skip meals and etc(w/o her knowing if not she'll definately kill me haha).. but today have to contribute money to buy chocs for the docs and nurses.. now left like a few dollars for the remaining wk??

2004-12-26T01:22:00.000+08:00

haha.. havent been blogging for a long time... busy with my attachment and stuff... working is like so sian... coz my lab only have 4 ppl.. everyday see the same ppl.. haha.. and abit stressful... haiz... recently my DNA extraction keeps failing.. sigh.. i alr drawn my blood twice liao... i still rem first time i felt so weak after drawing my blood... coz i didnt have lunch earlier.. now a new protocol but quite unstable too.. every morning have to drag myself to work... haiz.. i miss sch

hmm had fun at jo-n hse last nite.. yea.. thanx God for this chance of fellowshiping.. somemore its a combined celebration between tp and nyp!! yupz.. finally get to chat with ritchie again.. hee.. jiayou bro... and con't to train to be gay ok.. haha... oops.. anyway just to comment, yup u did quite a gd job... i think ya gay contact will be so touched by ya.. keke.. anyway... so blessed to know u.. thanx for ya word of wisdom too.. learn sth frm you

yup.. and to ken and xing xing... really glad to have ya guys in our big family.. cont to seek God more and exp life to the fullest... =p

sigh.. i have been battling with this temptation inside me... haiz... how... sigh... i myself cant even control myself.. how to help others?? God................ y? if i didnt receive those msgs i wont be so moody rite now... every time i hear songs in the radio.. i feel so bad and sorrowful.... God... sometimes i thought i wont go back but i dont know... i think i can control it with His grace and Love.. but i begin to doubt myself again.... y... arh... nope.. i have to trust Him.. i'm doing this for Him... yessh...it's not abt me in this battle alone

yup and my mom.... ahh.. sometimes i feel like i'm stuck in the middle... i want to do more for God.. but i cant.. coz i'm restricted somehow.. if i'm always hanging out fellowshipping, she will complain.. hai... i dont know wad to do to please her man... it's so hurting to see her worrying abt me.. y cant she understand i can take care of myself? for e.g walking home from tampines interchange after 1am coz i miss the last bus.. this happen afew times.. i'm a guy lor.. wad would i be afraid of... hmm.. i dont mind saving up those taxi fees by walking home.. haiz...

2004-12-26T01:19:00.000+08:00

Running After You
by Planet Shakers

Your Word is a light unto my path

Your Love guides me through my darkest night

And even though sometimes Your ways

I cannot understand

I’ll never walk away because my future’s

In Your hands

I don’t care what people will say

I’m running after You

I won’t turn back and go their way

Coz I’m running after You

Yeah I’m running after You

I’m running after You

(I will run to You)

I don’t care what people will say

I’m running after You

I won’t turn back and go their way

Coz I’m running after You

Don’t matter what may come my way

I’m running after you

It’s You I’m following today

I’m running after You

I’m running after You

2004-12-05T18:41:00.000+08:00

Student Conference (2 - 3 Dec)

God spoke to me a few times during these few days. pastor ben peached a powerful lesson on impt of God's Word. he told us how 'face the music' pharse is derived.. and he went on revealing a powerful point, that is 'God's Word will judge mankind'. the story stirred my heart quite alot.. i felt guilty after hearing the story. yes, i can hide frm my cL or uL now.. but i cant hide frm God. i have to be responsible for my own actions. God will not be deceived. i have to face His judgement one day. i haf been reflecting on myself on wad i had done ever since i received Christ. i need to change for His purpose to be done thru me. i cannot be a coward anymore. i need to get out of my personalities. i had always been afraid to voice out myself coz i have been self-condemning myself all this while. all the negative thoughts abt me being a nobody and yup someone dull and uninteresting had been revolving in my mind in the past. God i really need more courage frm ya. thanx for hitting me so hard in my heart for this, Lord.

the 2nd thing is that.. recently one of my pri sch fren asked me whether i want to make extra income and stuff like that.. i agreed coz i really need it... and i met him and went to the organisation. i dont know what that organisation is doing yup.. but i think it's some sort of multi-mkging company.... and the ppl over there told me their purpose is to help the ppl who have problems and who wants to make frens etc... i told him i need time to consider.. one of the pastor jeff's teachings is abt God's Covenant with His children.... and he said something like the church is like a God's covenant for us in this modern world. He wants to protect us and he is always faithful and trustworthy. He will help us in times of trouble and shield us frm harm. yup.. and ya i shouldnt seek for another place other than Hope when i have problems or when i need to earn extra income.... so i rejected my fren's offer... and i realise that one of the reasons i went to visit his organisation initally is because of my greed... becoz my fren told me if i want to make extra income then can meet up and talk.. Father... i didnt realise i have this greed in my heart until now... i need to change man.... thanx You for revealing this to me... luv Ya Father...

2004-12-05T18:29:00.000+08:00

The Story of the Cheese and Cracker Christian

A man booked passage on a ship that was crossing the Atlantic. He brought with him enough money to buy a ticket, a block of cheese and some crackers for the long voyage. The first few days at sea the cheese and crackers tasted good, but eventually they became stale. Each day as he watched the porters carry large steaks, lobster, chickens and other delicious foods to the ship's guests, he became very hungry. In fact, he became so hungry that he grabbed one of the porters. "I'll do anything to get one of those steaks," he said. "I'll wash dishes, clean rooms, and even mop the deck." The porter replied, "You bought a ticket, didnt you? The meals come with the ticket."

The moment we become children of God through faith in Christ, we became heirs of God, and all of His divine supernatural resources are made available to us. Everything we need including wisdom, love, power to be men and women of God and to be fruitful witnesses for Christ is available to us. But most Christians continue to live in self-imposed spiritual poverty because they do not know how to appropriate from God those spiritual resources which are already theirs.

It is useless to try to live in our own power the kind of life God has commanded us to live. Our strength must come from the Lord! The Holy Spirit came to enable us to know Christ. When we receive Christ in our lives, we experience a new birth, and are indewlt by the Spirit. The Holy Spirit enables us to live and share the abundant life which Jesus promised to all who trusts Him.

~

i learn alot from this article... you might be asking now how can we be filled with the fullness of Holy Spirit. the answer is by faith. yessh.. the moment we received Christ, we are alr filled with the Holy Spirit. it's the working of the Holy Spirit that prompted us to receive Christ by faith. everything we receive from God from the moment of our spiritual birth till our death is by faith. so bros and sis, let us walk in the Spirit everyday and not live according to the sinful nature. let our mind be controlled by our Holy Spirit, let our Holy Spirit direct our life. back to the question.. we can be filled by the Holy Spirit by faith alone. and prayer is one of the way of expressing our faith. and dont forget the concept of faith and deeds (James 2:18). after we haf prayed, lets exercise it. let 's utilize the unlimited available resources to us thru faith. let our strength and courage come frm our Lord, frm our Spirit during this sowing season! pray to God daily!

2004-11-21T03:40:00.000+08:00

Now That You're Near
By Hillsongs Australia

Hold me in Your arms

Never let me go

I wanna spend eternity with You

(verse 1)

I stand before You, Lord

And give You all my praise

Your love is all I need

Jesus, You're all I need

(verse 2)

My life belongs to You

You gave Your life for me

Your grace is all I need

Jesus, You're all I need

(pre chorus)

Hold me in Your arms

Never let me go

I wanna spend eternity with You

(chorus)

And now that You're near

Everything is different

Everything's so different, Lord

And I know I'm not the same

My life You've changed

And I wanna be with You

I wanna be with You

(bridge)

And I will sing for You always

'Cause in Your presence God is where I wanna stay

2004-11-21T02:52:00.000+08:00

yoz updating my life again.. this wk has been a tiring wk for me... first wk of attachment was abit scary.. i made alot of mistakes (e.g. stopping other ppl's experiments without knowing) and yup kept on forgetting the protocols like spinning the blood sample and operating the thermocycler.. there are more lar.. but wont waste my time writing here.. haha.. i still find it hard to adjust my sleeping hrs.. i got this minor flu and sore throat ... but i still kept on eating heaty stuff like popcorn chicken (my fav!!!!), western foods, french fries, long john silver etc.. =p. haha... but now feeling much better le, after praying to God today... so refreshed!! oh ya on fri i received a msg from joshua.. haha.. surprised that he wanted to meet me for dinner.. so we hanged ard at orchard road.. saw nyp4 ppl doing ecg there.. i also want to increase my contact pool but no time to do evax... oh ya.. today i received a news.. sandy is visiting my church this christmas!! wow... that's so wonderful. she's one of the closest sec sch fren i had.. and i really thank God that her heart is being moved and she has taken this step of faith to visit us.. coz i know her parents might object her becoming a christian.. i realli thanx God for her courage... so yup... i'm realli excited coz beside sandy, recently i received this msg from weili (another sec sch fren).. she just converted.. in fact her whole family is converted in another church.. i was like so happy for her man! imagine her whole family converted together at the same time!! God is so real! hmm ya another thing is, i'm not sure whether to give up my cca (wushu) coz i find that i cant handle so many things at the same time... i'm still thinking...

acc don, together with other nyp2 bros, to buy his bag after service... then later acc weibin to pasir ris.. he was going for some bbq event... he is currently working part time.. yup.. and i spoke to him abt his spiritual life and yup i hope he wont forget wad he promised to me today... i really take his words seriously but at the same time i dont want to force him.. coz now everybody is regaining back the passion for God.. and i hope he will realise that it's time to settle down and think like a matured man... follow God and not men.. realli luv ya as a bro, weibin.. yup... just read thru karshun's matt cg plan... wow.. it's wonderful to have his place for this upcoming cg.. jiayou bro.. and i might not be able to go and bring ya the food coz i will be having attachment.. but i'll try to buy the stuff and give ya on tues nite.. thanx God for ya bro! hmm going to slp... ZZzzz

2004-11-16T03:55:00.000+08:00

wow really enjoyed the camp... the fellowship was fun... find that the ppl are more united after this camp... yup that includes my cg, nyp2... but i really hope that weibin will take up this resposiblities to grow again in God's presence and and receives the blessings from God. hope he will attend cg next wk.. i hope he knows that everybody in nyp2 wants him to return and serve God together. i'm really happy for darren... althought at times he still joke during teachings time and stuff like that... but he has been taking small steps each day towards maturity.. darren, i want to encourage you to learn and read more and apply these Words in your life. you will find real joy... pastor jeff has said this before.. happiness is the result/outcome of happenings that occur ard you. in another word, whether you are happy or not, it depends on situations. but real joy comes from the fruits of the Spirit as you serve and follow God everyday. once you have the joy, u wont be feeling lost or insecure. jiayou k! influence the ppl ard you in a positive way. back to the camp, the programme was abit packed... plus we tend to slp very late, ard 3am or so.. so i always ended up waking up late.. after the last programme which is the photo-taking, rushed home to update the student conference list and sent to zhen yan.. supposed to send her before 7pm. but i reached home at abt 7pm...hmmm i find that i still has this tendency to be late for appointments or completing tasks.. repent repent...

after this camp, i find that fulfiling the Great Commission is an impt vision for the churches as well as the believers. christmas is coming... nyp2, with strong convictions in our heart, is ready to break the goal of 10 ppl attending cg! just now we were busy msging each other for the confirmation of visitors for this wk matt cg event and also encouragements to each other for our sowing efforts. i find that this should be the spirit of nyp2! amen?! and i have set a personal goal of 3 sheeps by end of january! and you know wad? i really want to see yr 1 contacts coming to know Jesus from my diploma course (MB). coz i'm the only Hope guy from MB... hmm.. really need more faith in this area... during the worship at sun night, i teared... coz i sensed this strong compassion and burden for the ppl who had backslided... and throughout my spiritual path in Hope, i find that i'm lonely...most of the yr1 brothers are transferred from the high sch.. they alr have this bond between them.. and i find it difficult to communicate with them.. not only the brothers but also my current shepherd... i dont know whether he's reading this now.. i really find it hard to account to him abt my life and my problems. but i know he cares for me alot... i really thank God for him who had comforted me when i cried. plus the other nyp2 bros... the reason why i teared is partly because of ap... she had impacted my life when i was under her care. i enjoyed the shepherding and caregrp time with her and other nyp4 members at that time. she knows my weaknesses and encouraged me again and again thru sms or msn etc... after she left, i began to stumble abit.. i suddenly felt like a stranger in the nyp unit among the bros and sis. and at that time most of the bros i hanged ard are not really helping me.. because of my shallow faith at that time, i got influenced alot.. and i began to drift away more from God. thankfully ritchie came into my life and blessed me. i believe God has placed him in my life at that crucial period to help me get up on my feet again. i really appreciate all the advices he gave me and the limited times we can spend together.. yupz.. i'm more secure in God now.. so dont worry abt me =p.. after this camp i hope to impove my relationship with my shepherd and also my cg members so that we can work well together to hit our target goal..

end jan goals

shepherd of 3 sheeps (at least one from MB course)
get weibin back on the right track
help nyp2 to hit 10
impove my communication skills
read finish NT

today is my first day of attachment.. need to get some rest... oh ya.. i want to affirm giselle again here... you have done well in preparing the food for us! and thanx for ya care and concern. =) and jiahui too.. find that you have this sweet learning spirit... thanx for serving in this camp food committee too yup..

i'll read this post continuously everyday to remind me of my end-jan goals. encourage all my bros and sis-in-christ to meditate on your end-jan goals and fulfill it!

2004-11-13T01:27:00.000+08:00

fri
wake up in the morning feeling really bad and weak... so decided to skip the morning seminar.. then prepared the games for the afternoon cg... during the cg, leslie prayed for the health of the members.. and the prayer did work.. feeling much much better now.. now can fully concentrate during the upcoming 3 days camp.. hmm.. going to pack for the camp... realli excited abt it!

2004-11-10T23:11:00.000+08:00

I’m feeling weak.. no appetite to eat… wad’s wrong with me?? Looks like I’m falling sick…

2004-11-10T15:14:00.000+08:00

tues
hmm find the seminar abit long.. i couldnt conc after the 3rd break.. glad to know this np bro called weijie... amazingly he lives in tampines too...went home with him after makaning with the other chruch bros and sis at ps... had a good chat with him in the bus.. jiayou bro (weijie)! i thought i could reach aloha chalet by 5 plus... but it rained unexpectedly in the afternoon.. so i got stuck in the orchard road for a while... because i have never been to that chalet before, i called my fren to fetch me.. i told them i'll be waiting outside downtown east cheers.. but they couldnt find me.. anyway they also unfamiliar with the place.. btw the watermelon and syrup is so heavy.. yup.. the hamster is sooo cute.. it's a male.. hee... and cyvia kept calling him my son... haha.. i still have no idea wad name to give him... leejing jokingly called him small kc (translate to chinese)... maybe i will called him leb leb ->inspiration from donnie ... keke...

2004-11-08T21:17:00.000+08:00

yo... here to update my day.. today is so fuunnn.. yea.. long time never gather with zhiwei, haojun and meiyin le.. realli miss them.... today went to sch in the morning to acc weichang to do his wushu weapon logbook stuff.. cheehow and me help him with the maintaining of weapons... and then zhiwei, meiyin and haojun joined us later to help too.. after that zhiwei and haojun taught us the complete ji ben gun fa routines .. i missed the last few strokes because of my early exam period.... then we makan at the amk market place.. but very unlucky.. the moment we stepped out of the sch, it rained heavily!! althought a few of us brought umbrella.. but we still braved the rain and got to amk.. haha.. it was so fun.... then after makaning, went to play pool.. i wasnt feeling well after the late lunch.. imagine having lunch at 4pm?? haha.. but still acc them to play pool.. the first game was very bad... because of my gastric pain, i cant conc and aim properly.. plus i was too weak to hit the ball.. the first few turns, i miz the ball.. i became demoralized and anyhow played throughout the rest of the game.. then after that went to rest at the seats.. after resting for very long, i decided to play again.. the 2nd and 3rd game was quite okay.. althought i find that my aiming wasnt that good after all.. but i still manage to win those two games despite of my conditions.. after the pool games, went to cyvia hse to collect the hamster cage... althought the cage is simple but its sooo beautiful and i believe the hamster will live comfortably in it.. thanx cyvia.. hee... tml will be having class chalet.. i'm supposed to buy the fruits.. hee.. tml will be quite busy for me.. i think i will be going to the seminar in the morning, althought liyan havent realli cfm with me whether i'm in the class... she just reply 'can' to my msg... then after the seminar i will be helping out in the Hope store decoration.. hope that i can leave at ard 3pm so that i can prepare for the class chalet... and there's a sudden msg that says my class have to attend a seminar @ nyp on wed morning (11am to 1pm).. it will clash with my parable seminar... argh.. hope that the nyp one is not compulsory.. will ask joyce tml.. okie.. checking out.. take care guys!

2004-11-07T15:54:00.000+08:00

Sat Service
the sermon is abt "struggling with prayer". Pastor jeff challenged us a few things yesterday...

#1 Pray for the ppl ard us.. our families, our friends, our bro and sis in chruch. pray for the non-believers to know Christ.

#2 Pray for daily needs.. start the new day by praying in the the morning.. dont be waked up by the alarm.. wake up 5 mins earlier... pray in the morning.. and anticipate it when ya go thru ya day...

#3 Closer relationship with God... aware of invisible reality in ya life.. the outcome -> quicker to repent, less fearful when bad times come. living in the presence of God. let God to be so real in ya life... so that the non-believers ard ya can witness it..

#4 Know ya temptations.. pray specifically everyday that you will overcome it... for me is laziness...

things to take note in today sermon teaching.. i find this sentence very powerful.. ritchie got share with me once.. and its alr firmly anchored to my heart..
God will only test us and NOT tempt us.. only devils tempts us...
God gives us testings in our life to overcome it so that we will be stronger after we went thru the testings. the testings he gave is to mature our characters and refine our characters to be more Jesus-like... our faith will increase each time we overcome each testing...

Differences between testings and temptations:

Testings	Temptations
God test us hoping that we will pass, so that we will become more like God.	Devils ~~test~~ tempt us hoping that we will ~~pass~~ fail, so that we will become more like ~~God~~ devil.

Brothers and sisters.. must remember this!!!! Dont fall for devil's trick.

Verse to Read!!
1 Cor 10:13b ~ And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.

2004-11-07T15:52:00.000+08:00

-=yawnz=- just woke up and complete updating the student conference list.. supposed to complete it and send to zhen yan by 12 noon... signz... must repent... yesterday was fun.. haha.. saw some funny clips.. and played maple story till very late.. i think 3am.. haha.. by that time everybody was like going crazy.. and talked like drunken men.. first they criticize the game for killing harmless snails.. next they were thinking that the big mushroom must be very tasty if cooked.. yup.. then don typed something lame in the conversation windows.. and we began to talk to one of the player some lame stuff.. she said she's from sweden?? haha... funny sia... the girls were in the living room watching spirited away... after the show had finished.. yongfu set up the playstation 2 and we played till 7am in the morning?? i fell aslp while watching them playing (after 6am)... after that we had breakfast at the mac in the central.. and went home.. i couldnt help but slp on bed immediately when i reached home.. i set the alarm at 10am so i can finish doing my stuff and send the email by noon... but i overslp! yup.. again.. i tend to overslp fequently.. yup just saw the hope seminar teaching abt parables... i have always been interested to learn parables and prophecy in the bible.. last time i kept asking ritchie to teach me all these.. hee.. but anyway i guess the reg is closed alr?? liyan havent reply my msg.. actually thinking of playing the badminton with the DI ppl this afternoon.. but i guess i'm too tired to get out of my hse =p

2004-11-06T01:14:00.000+08:00

Once a non-christian man asked a christian lady: "How do you know that God exists?"

The lady paused for a while and asked the man: "How do you know that the sun is in the sky?"

The man looked up the sky and replied: "That's simple! Because I can see the ray of light shining on me and I feel the heat of the sun."

The lady smiled and replied: "That's it.. I know God exists because I see His Light shining on my path everyday and guiding me when I'm lost. That's when I feel the warmth of His Love."

Keep The Candle Burning
by Point Of Grace

You think you're alone there in your silent storm,
But I've seen the tears you've cried.
Falling down and trying to drown,
The flame of hope inside.
Let me tell you now, tell you now...

Chorus:
When you're walking in the dead of night,
When your soul is churning,
When you hope seems out of sight,
Keep the candle burning.
All it takes is one steady heart,
In a world that's turning.
Shine a light and pierce the dark,
Keep the candle burning.
Keep the candle burning.

When you're down and you're discouraged,
When the darkness clouds your view,
You've got to gather up your courage.
You know the Lord is gonna see you through.
Let me tell you now, tell you now...

When you're walking in the dead of night,
When your soul is churning,
When you hope seems out of sight,
Keep the candle burning.
All it takes is one steady heart,
In a world that's turning.
Shine a light and pierce the dark,
Keep the candle burning.
Keep the candle burning.

One ray of light always breaks through.
Follow wherever He takes you.
Wherever He takes you.

Repeat Chorus 2x

2 Timothy 4:7 ~ I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.

P.S. I read the above story a few months ago.. This is not the original script that i had received thru my mail. I tried to find it back but I guess I've deleted it. anyway this story still remind strong in my heart because it really touched me alot.

2004-11-06T01:10:00.000+08:00

Fri
went for the post-exam celebration dinner with my nyp unit... haha.. fun.. okie.. darren asked me whether i can stay overnight at his hse tml.. the whole nyp unit are invited actually.. supposed to have this overnight thing last sat.. but i dont really know how to convince my mom to let me stay... so throughout the bus journey, i was thinking and began to speak to Him.. suddenly an idea came into my mind.. haha... and it worked perfectly well!! yea.. I told my mom i will be starting my attachment next next wk so these two wks are the only wks i can relax and enjoy... she agreed eventually... haha.. havent tell darren yet.. i think tml then surprise him.. haha since he never read my blog... and suddenly everything seems to fall in place.. at first i was worried abt the hamster.. but my fren suddenly msg me and told me she can only give me during the class chalet.. yea.. now i have no worries.. can stay overnight with peace.. haha

2004-11-04T21:46:00.000+08:00

YAY!! exams are OVER!! forever gone man.. keke.. at least in my nyp life.. next sem going to attachment le.. NO MORE exams.. Yessh!! the proteomics paper yesterday and today's mangement paper were abit tough.. but nvm.. at least its over.. today got this attachment briefing.. i am posted to a 23 weeks attachment programme starting from 16 Nov!! argh... i was hoping i can do the 3 months microarray in-house project in nyp... but now i have to do PCR for the next few months.. haha.. but i pray that i can produce good results in my attachment... so i can learn more new stuff over there other than doing PCR... oh ya.. forget to mention my attachment place and working hrs.. hee.. i will be attached to National Heart Center @ Singapore General Hospital... my working day is from mon to sat.. will be working from 8.30am to 5.30pm on wkdays.. and thank God, my sat working hrs is from 8.30am to 1.30pm.. but i afraid i might miss the nov WFL class.. let's hope i can rush there on time... and abt my pay.. haha.. i'm very practical one... compared to my other frens, its lower and my working hrs is longer!! hai... not fair.. haha... i was abit scared also.. i think the supervisor there is very strict... i heard that he chose students for his two attachment vacancies.. one of my fren and i were the lucky ones that are being selected.. keke.. the previous 2 seniors that have been attached to there did some excellent jobs.. hope that i can do nyp some proud too.. haha

my hamster is going to arrive on sat.. going to prepare a housewarming party for its arrival.. keke.. have to prepare the cage.. cya guys..

2004-11-04T21:40:00.000+08:00

Pascal, the French Philosopher, once said that in the heart of every man is a God shaped vacuum that can only be filled by God himself. God's desire is that each of us have our heart filled with his love through the person of Jesus Christ.

a site which i find meaningful... i like the flash
Knowing God
do drop me a mail at megaman_ckc@yahoo.com.sg if u find this site meaningful.. cheerios..

Read this verse:
James 1:17 - Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.

2004-11-02T13:46:00.000+08:00

Shout Of The King
by Hillsong United

I give You praise for You deserve it

I give You praise for what You've done

I give You praise for You are able

I'll give You praise 'til I overcome

I give You praise when the sun is shining

I give You praise in the dark of night

I give You praise when the battle rages

I give You praise 'til it works out right

Chorus:

The shout of the King is among us

God lives here in our praises

The shout of the King is among us

Praise Him

Praise Him in everything

I give You praise for You deserve it

I give You praise for what You've done

I give You praise for You are able

I'll give You praise 'til I overcome

I give You praise when the sun is shining

I give You praise in the dark of night

I give You praise when the battle rages

I give You praise 'til it works out right

Repeat Chorus 2x

Heaven opens as we sing Your praise

Angels join us as we praise Your name

Heaven opens as we sing Your praise

Angels join us as we praise Your name

Repeat Chorus 2x

Praise Him (Praise Him)

Praise Him in everything (Praise Him in everything)

i'm going to have a new hamster some day this wk.. going to take good care of it... yay.. after my exam a classmate of mine is going to give me coz she has lots of hamster at home alr... havent tell my mom yet coz she will not agree one.. haha.. the first hamster i got is from my sec 3 maths teacher.. i called her snowy... one of her student gave it to her but she's too afraid to accept it so she gave me instead.. i still remember when my mom first saw snowy she was shocked. initially she objected me to keep snowy but i cant possibly leave her alone... mom kept telling me to sell it away or gave it away.. haha.. she finds keeping pets troublesome... anyway snowy died many months ago.. still miss her..

2004-11-01T17:50:00.000+08:00

Greatest Hits: My Prerogative

2004-10-31T19:49:00.000+08:00

did a spiritual gifting questionnaires yesterday. the survey interpreted my five dominant giftings as helps, serving, giving, mercy and prophet!! that amazes me... but i really pray that God will reveal my gifts to me one day. so that i can utilize them to serve Him to my fullest abilities. yup... having two exams next wk, proteomics on wed and business mangement on thu! haha.. looking forward to thu man.. once my exams over, i can have more time to sow and outreach... also the lecturers will reveal my finalized attachment place and my yr 3 project!

.: Prayer :.

Lord no matter wad gifts You will give me, i will faithfully accept it and use it to the best of my abilities. Lord i thank You for Your grace that have poured on me everyday. I know i am responsible for my gifts. i will develop my gifts to help in my local church, in my ministry and glorify Your name on high. Lord i will use these spiritual gifts to bless my fellow bro and sis-in-christ. Lord I pray that thru this gifts, my character will be maturing at the same time too. so that i will be ready for Your return. In Jesus name, Amen.

2004-10-29T13:04:00.000+08:00

wed
the paper was tough.. althought i did memorize but i forgot all the facts when i was doing the paper.. manage to ans most of the questions but rather incomplete.. i think at most a C le.. but thank God for that morning... when i was bathing, one of my my specs len fell off the frame.. luckily the screw is still there... if not, i would have wasted a whole lot of time searching for it! and i dont have a spare specs to wear.. wah.. after the paper, went home immediately.. planned to study for tml drug development paper but i slept throught the afternoon.. wasted alot of time... but lucky that module wasnt that difficult to digest.. haha.. manage to do it in afew hrs at late night...

thu
wow.. the paper is still okay... i guess can get a B.. haha... yay!! most of the tips came out in the exam so there wasnt much prob.. hee... again i spent my whole afternoon slping.. ahh... sin.. and i havent even touch the sfg notes for the last few wks... signz.. no motivation.. temptations everywhere.. haha... my bed my com my tv wadever.. luckily at night i found a conducive place to study.. haha.. my hse kitchen.. yup i managed to stay awake till 5am in the morning.. closed the kitchen door to keep me away from all the temptations.. and imagine the fresh morning dawned. realli cooling man.. yea... u can try that too!

fri
the paper is ok.. but i did a stupid mistake.. i left out one essay question unanswered.. my carelessness cost me 10 marks.. i was stunned when i realised that after the exam... i guess another B ba.. if only i realised my mistake during the exam, i think i might have the chances to get a A. a lesson learnt: read the instructions everytime when u sit for any paper. okie.. but then at least i know that God still blessed me greatly throughout these few days.. my specs and lack of time to study.. i admit i'm a last-min guy... but God still continue to bless me faithfully in my studies.. must change my bad habits.. having Cg later.. i better take a nap now.. bye.. cya guys tml!!

2004-10-26T15:04:00.000+08:00

cool weather.. but why?? why at this exam period.. make me feel sleepy.. haha... reading thru His Word just now.. make me feels refreshed once again!!! i feel more energized now.. yay.. can study more... haha.. having lunch so thought of blogging...

i was reading thru James just now. while reading thru James... happen to find that many verses in the book actually speak to me at that point of time... one of the key verse is James 2:18 ["But someone will say, "You have faith; I have deeds." Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by what I do."]. it's about faith and deeds. living faith makes a difference. we have to make sure our faith is more than a statement. our faith should always translates into action and good deeds and not just knowing it. even devils know God exists, but do they obey?

the other verse goes like this "Be patient, then, brothers, until the Lord's coming. See how the farmer waits for the land to yield its valuable crops and how patient he is for the autumn and spring rains. You too, be patient and stand firm, because the Lord's coming is near." - James 5:7-8. like farmers, we should wait patiently, be well-prepared and look for ways to extend God's kingdom before His return. i'm sure these verses have much more meaning than wad i've wrote. hope u guys can meditate on it and allow God to speak to you if u have time.. cheerios..

okie.. haha.. share with u guys one more thing... last night my mom asked me whether i have any intention to leave church... hmm.. and she questioned abt my tithing too.. i gave her an obvious 'no' answer. the situation is so strange.. i afraid i'll make her feel sad.. but thank God, nothing happened.. i hope that she'll understand me and of crse Christ one day..

2004-10-24T21:23:00.000+08:00

-=yawnz=- studying is so boring.. but the atmosphere is getting tenser and tenser. wed will be my first paper - mbid. follow by thu - drug development and fri - sfg... anyway weibin and i promised to support jonathan in his bowling competition in the morning.. but i was too tired that i overslept.. in the end i didnt go.. hmm.. i woke up ard 11am and study for awhile... then weibin called me later in the noon asking me whether i wanted to play bball and badminton with them and the DI ppl. i agreed because i wanted to de-stress.. haha.. sometimes must relax abit also.. but anyway planning to study later from midnight till the morning since i didnt study in the afternoon. yup.. the bball game was interesting. althought i didnt play much but it was interesting hanging ard with them and observing their bball skills. met donnie again today.. hmm.. he accompanied me to the bus stop when i was going home. this time we talked abt our future plans after we graduate. seriously i havent think abt it much coz i have no idea wad my job will be like after graduation. haha.. i admire donnie's vision and ambition actually.. really pray that he will succed in everything he does in the future, his dreams, his spiritual growth etc... oh yah.. suddenly remember ritchie's and cyvia's advice.. have to make full use of my time to study =).. okie.. cya guys ard..

2004-10-23T23:59:00.000+08:00

wow.. today sermon as promised by pastor jeff is so powerful and inspiring (at least to me) that i want to share with u guys... pastor jeff preached the sermon with such strong conviction... the title is "achieving your greatest life contribution". to highlight some impt points, look at the pics i've drawn (paiseh for bad drawing! ha ha).

yup basically a normal non-christian point view of greatness (power), like the above diagram, is self-serving and self-centered. they tend to achieve goals that will only benefit themselves for e.g feeling of satisfaction of authority over the ppl etc. but Jesus said [in Matt 20:26]: "Not so with you". ppl of God should have self-sacrificial spirit. Jesus is the King of King. but He came down to earth and humbled Himeslf to the ppl and sacrifice Himself by nailing our sins on the cross so that we can now live life to the fullest with freedom. Jesus views of greatness is like this:

"... many who are the last will be the first." [Matt 19:30]. we should serve by leading and of course thru giving and love! and one of the most difficult ways to show that we love God is to love the ppl [Gal 5:13-14] ard us. we should put everybody before us first and put ourselves at the last position. love others more than yaself. it's much easier to say 'I love God' then to prove that we love ppl in action. that is also the time when our characters are being tested, mould and refined. eventually our ultimate and greatest contribution that we can achieve in our life is to serve God by loving and serving ppl.

as usual, pastor jeff added some humour in his sermon.. it was so hilarious that i cant stop laughing even now.. haha.. when he asked who love God raise up ya hand, all the believers raised up their hand. then he ask the next question how we know we love God. then he asked again in a different way to make his questions clearer. so he wanted us to assume that he is Jesus and asked the question who love God again. nobody raise up their hands except a bro.. then he paiseh and emphasize that word ASSUME... haha.. then he joked that he is straight (he is married).. i couldnt stop laughing man.. haha..

the whole sermon is so funny and inspiring.. kind of regret that my contacts didnt visit the service today. they missed all the good stuff.. anyway.. after the service and dinner, supposed to play pool with my bros and DI bros at the cappage basement. in the end i just stood there and watched.. haha.. because i wanted to save money. donnie and i were outside the pool arcade and we chatted for quite some time. finds that he is a fun and sincere bro. he gave me some encouragements too and shared with me the story of Cain and Abel in the book of Genesis. cool.. hee.. enjoy chatting with him. after pooling, went to the lan game arcade to join some other bros. they were playing frozen throne.. as usual i only watched them play la.. then i did one very stupid thing. coz i wasnt playing and my computer is on so the shop owner asked me to help him shut down the pc.. after the whole pc is shut down, i try to find the 'power' button. thinking that the power button belongs to the pc, i pressed it lor. guess what, my fren who was sitting beside me in the process of playing the game was interrupted. because i actually pressed his pc's power button!!! very stupid rite! haha.. i feel so bad man... after that went home with ritchie as usual.. he told me some strange things. then before he alighted the bus he told me he was joking.. hmm... haha.. that's all.. got to slp now.. take care guys!

2004-10-22T21:48:00.000+08:00

Hahaz.. at last CT exam is over.. didnt manage to study and prepare this paper well... wasnt very prepared.. but once again managed to do most of the questions in the paper.. esp the 2 eassy questions that cost 60 marks!! Thank God man! I think I can at least secure a 'B' for this module (althought I aimed for an 'A')... Hmm.. nvm abt not meeting my goal.. now I know my problem lies in time mangement.. well.. 4 more days to the next paper... I have the wisdom from God but now I need more strength and motivation to study... O Lord.. Help me.. an advance thanx to You =)

.:something to ponder:.

This is what the Lord says:
"Let not the wise man boast of his wisdom
or the strong man boast of his strength
or the rich man boast of his riches
but let him who boasts boast about this:
that he understands and knows me...."

Jeremiah 9:23-24

:: new skin ::

2004-10-21T10:53:00.000+08:00

Reason: Bored.. Okie.. back to my revision..

2004-10-20T15:19:00.000+08:00

Supposed to meet my sec sch frens yesterday but was cancelled in the end due to some miscommunication. Sighz.. partly is my fault la... Whenever they asked me out in the past, I was always not free... Today is their first day of their SIP, hope everything runs smoothly.. Jiayou peeps..

Just got home.. At last two papers down.. phew.... I guess I can hit my targets set for these 2 modules.. yay!! Didnt have much peace these few days because of the tests... Slight running nose these few days. My immune system is going down =|... Now have to get prepared for the coming CT test on Fri which is a major one, 60%!! God bless me. Tml business classes are going to be at the business block coz the lecturers cant book the Blk Q LTs. I guess its the first time having lessons over at the other sch.. Sounds cool...oh yah, and the dress-code must be smart casual.. Hmm.. Okie.. getting out of here soon.. Gd luck for my CT revision..

Open Letter to You ...

2004-10-18T15:07:00.000+08:00

Dear Jesus...

My heart feels so empty this morning.... and weary... went thru small little testings today. as usual was in a rush to sch, but the bus was ultra slow. I got more and more impatient. Many different words begin to fill my heart. Strangely a few secs later, my mind stop thinking of all these and become peaceful again... I decided to read and took a small nap on the bus instead. when i opened my eyes, I saw the stadium.. hahaz.. it's near the mrt.. i know You are with me all along in the bus (in fact always). Thanx for accompany me!

After my lessons ended in the afternoon, I was feeling low and irritated coz tml is my test! Arghz.. havent study yet and I have to rush afew assignments by tonight. I was thinking wad am I going to do. Weichang asked me afew questions after the class but i was too tired and didnt really ans him. I was discussing the business project with Jackie over the lunch, I voiced out in quite a demanding way. I think i was adding more stresses to him that time... i shouldnt have done that. After lunch, we were walking towards mrt.. I was cold towards Chee How and Weichang coz i felt like getting out of the place.. i dont know why.... and i hate the idea of walking alone in front of them. I just couldnt control my moods today. I thought i had overcome this feeling long ago... but now its coming back to me again... I didnt say goodbye to them. When i'm alone in the bus, i began to reflect myself... praise and worship songs were all over my head. I adjusted back to myself after that. Thanx for the wonderful music You have created. I'll always remember =)

Your Sincerely,
Caleb

2004-10-16T23:50:00.000+08:00

Enjoyed myself today alot!! I've never been so happy ever since i join Hope.. took bus 65 in the morning.. thought i'll be on time for the resource training, but that bus took nearly one and a half hr to reach somerset!! arghz.. usually it only takes ard 1hr.. yupz... Eilton, so paiseh late again this wk.. after the training, i slacked ard orchard road since DPM starts at 3.30pm... bumped into Joshua along the way. went back to nexus auditorium to see if there's anybody there who can accompany me.. hahaz.. but found no one.. so went starhub foodcourt to read my Bible.. surprisingly found Leslie, Yiquan and Eilton studying there.. Don, Karshun and Jonathan joined in later.. after that we headed back to Nexus for DPM.. Excited for my first ushering duty today! hahaz.. I find so much joy when serving God! But now I have to make a decision to stay in Hope resource or ushering. I really like both... Can I choose both? Hee.. I think I have to discuss that with my shepherd and leader next wk...

After service and dinner, went home together with Ritchie and Qing Cai.. have a nice chat with Qing Cai.. realli inspired by ya simple faith and obedience for God.. Jia you man! hope u can achieve ya '1 sheep' goal by this christmas! and I really want to thank God for Ritchie.. Althought we are from different unit.. but he still put in his time and effort to help me when i was struggling with my walk with God earlier this yr.. *sob sob* okie.. before i get too emotional.. Haha.. Thank God for Ritchie! I pray that u will be happy always and increase ya sheep no!! Hahaz.. let's work hard together!

2004-10-15T23:50:00.000+08:00

Sching has been quite slacking these days. Most of the lessons are revisions. This morning as usual woke up quite late. Because there's a test in the morning, i had no choice but to take a cab to sch. I think this test result will be quite bad, coz focus on the wrong areas. But nvm it only constitutes 10% in the final grade. Thank God! Hee.

Yupz... after all the lessons ended, went to northpoint to buy a black polo tee for tml ushering. Then rushed back to sch for shepherding. Realli enjoy the sheperding session alot. Coz i learned some new things today! Hahaz.. Going to share with u guys.. The lesson is about a leader's role in bringing renewal. One of the role of leadership is to serve God (set apart time and resources) wholeheartedly. This sounds simple but it takes alot of discipline to really do it. Althought many pplz have been encouraging me to plan my wk fully ahead to maximize my time for Him. But i find it difficult to start coz i'm quite a lazy guy.. Haiz.. Nvm.. i pray every night that God will help me to overcome my laziness =p. The second thing that speaks to me during the shepherding session is fasting. I usually fast primarily to save money.. the whole concept is wrong. I repent.. Yup it's like wad Joshua had said, if fasting without praying then it would become a normal dieting. My Holy Spirit actually prompted me just now to search and read more abt fasting.. i read thru the 2004 June camp booklet and have better understanding. To summarise fasting enables us to become overcomers, help us stay focus, and most importantly increase our faith.

Okie that's all! Hahaz.. a long entry.. really excited abt tml service!!! hahaz.. and tml is my first day doing usher duty... looking forward to it.. okie cya guys.. have a great wkend ahead!!